Beg For You (Rocktown Ink #1) Page 13

  My gaze moved over her body, tracing her subtle curves, and I had to drag my hand across my mouth, sure I was fucking drooling. “Panties,” I croaked out. “Take them…off.” Jesus. I couldn’t even get out three words without stumbling over them. And I probably could have said that in a better way, at least not sounding quite so fierce, so hungry, but I was beyond measuring my tone or my words at that point.

  But then I didn’t think I could form a coherent sentence in that moment even if I concentrated with everything I had. My brain felt as scrambled as it had right after the accident.

  She glanced at me over her shoulder, lashes at half mast, lips full and dark pink like she’d been sucking and biting them. Her color was high and it wasn’t from embarrassment. Cassy was turned way the fuck on.

  Her fingers slid down one side of her underwear, causing the delicate fabric to dip low on her hip, exposing one perfect creamy ass cheek. My dick pulsed. I was so fucking hard, so turned on, one hard stroke and I’d blow the fuck up.

  Shit, I wasn’t even sure I needed to touch myself at this point. I was mad with lust for this woman, out of my goddamn mind with want, which was why I had no control over what I said next. “Stop. Roll onto your back.”

  The cautious, logical part of my brain had left the building and was showing no sign of coming back.

  She did as I asked, dragging her teeth over her lower lip. Her breathing was ragged, full tits jiggling with every sharp exhale.

  “I’m having a hard time…concentrating, P-Princess. You wanna help me out?” My gaze moved over the beauty of her, down to the juncture of her closed thighs, the way her plain pink panties cupped her pussy.

  She nodded, fingers curling into the sheet on either side of her. “Yes,” she whispered. “Whatever you need.”

  I fought back a groan. “Put a pillow under your head so you can see me and lie back.”

  She did what I asked.

  I kept my feet planted, fighting my body’s need to go to her. Not fucking her wasn’t just about her anymore, trying to minimize the damage I was going to cause. I knew now if I fucked her, I wouldn’t be able to let her go. I was capable of a lot of things, and the way I was starting to feel about Cassy, I was almost afraid of what I might do to keep her. “Spread your legs,” I said roughly, the tornado of emotions coming through loud and clear in my voice.

  Her breath hitched and she stilled, slender throat working. Her fingers flexed at her side. She wasn’t sure. Shit, was she shy, nervous?

  For the first time since she walked into my shop, I decided to go with complete honesty. Hide nothing. Fucking beg. “You are the most beautiful, sexy woman I have ever seen, Cassy. Do this for me, give me this. Fuck…” I reached down and squeezed my iron-hard cock through my jeans and groaned. “I need it, Princess. Please, baby.” I’d never wanted anyone more in my life.

  The muscles in her thighs tightened for a split second then she slowly spread for me as her head fell back to the pillow.

  I groaned again. Jesus fucking Christ. “Shit, Cassy, I can see how wet you are. You’ve soaked those innocent-looking panties right through.”

  Her hands moved to her thighs, her fingers curling in, dragging down the length of them and leaving pink tracks in her skin.

  Her whole body was flushed and her tits looked fuller, her nipples dark and tight as fuck. “You ache, Cassy?”

  “Yes…I ache so bad.”

  I fucking swayed toward her but planted my feet again. “Slide a hand down the front for me…that’s it, baby.” Her hand disappearing down the front of her panties was the single sexiest thing I’d ever seen. My dick was leaking, a constant stream of pre-come pulsing from the head of my cock, soaking my boxers. “Dip lower between those pretty lips.” She did as I asked, her whimper making my legs fucking weak. “Tell me what you feel.”

  I could see her fingers sliding through her slit. She gasped and arched, body rolling. The action was exquisite, living art. The most beautiful dance I’d ever seen. She whimpered again.

  “Tell me, Cassy,” I growled.

  “I…I’m hot…and slick, and swollen.”

  My groan was low and loud. Fuck. I tore at the front of my jeans, shoved them and my boxers down, freeing my cock. “Look at me, Cassy. Look what you’ve done to me.” I was red and veined, the head glistening. Harder than I could ever remember being in my life.

  Her eyes that she had squeezed shut shot open, and her gaze slid a slow trail from my face down my body. When it landed on my cock, her eyes widened and she jolted on the bed like an electrical current had fired through her.

  “You did this to me, Princess. Only you.” I curled my fingers around my shaft and gave it a rough tug. Fuck, I was close to coming, so damn close. Her legs opened wider and I growled. “Slide a finger inside that tight pussy for me.”

  I watched that hand move behind her panties. Then she gasped, her hips undulating.

  My balls somehow grew even tighter. “That’s it. Work it…just like you do when no one’s watching. Show me…how you like to get off. Show me.”

  Her hand was moving constantly beneath the thin fabric. “How many fingers are you fucking yourself with, Cassy? Tell me.”

  She arched again, her cries getting higher. “Two. I’m using two.”

  “Can you fit another one in, Princess? Can you?”

  She shook her head, gasping. “I’m too tight.”

  “Fuck,” I barked and started jerking my dick harder, faster, my grip brutally tight.

  “Oh God, I’m…” Her hand moved, fingers sliding higher, furiously moving over her clit. “I’m going to come.”

  “Show me,” I gritted out. “Now, Cassy.”

  She cried out then jolted, body thrashing as she came apart, thighs slamming shut around her hand while she continued to work herself.

  I barked out a curse as a stream of hot come pulsed from the head of my cock, splashing my abs and coating my fingers. My limbs went weak and I stumbled back, collapsing in the chair behind me. My heart was smashing against the back of my ribs, my head in a tangle. The only thought that broke through the mess in my head was the word mine repeating on a loop over and over again.

  I lifted my head and stared across the gap between us. She was still on her back, eyes closed, hand down the front of her panties, chest rising and falling with her panted breaths, body limp.

  The sight of her like that, sated in my bed, made the word become a roar vibrating around my skull.

  Mine. Mine. Mine.

  I wanted to go to that bed. I wanted to fall on top of her. I wanted to wrap her in my arms, slide inside her, and take her, make her mine. Never let her go. But I couldn’t do that.

  What the fuck had I done?

  Chapter Thirteen

  Cassandra

  The hum of conversation sounded like bees buzzing around me incessantly. Another ballroom, another event for the wealthy of Springhaven. This was the last place I wanted to be.

  This room, these people, felt like a lie, a cardboard cutout of an old life I no longer wanted any part of. I had no friends here, no allies. The only person I’d truly trusted at events like this had been Chris.

  We’d trusted each other.

  Yes, I had my grandmother.

  But even though she and Chris meant the world to me, the two people in my life I would have done anything for, I still held something back from both of them.

  Even Ted didn’t know the pain I carried inside me, the guilt.

  Would I ever have someone in my life who I could trust with every part of me?

  Thick tattooed arms flashed through my mind, vicious scars, a sensual mouth. That rough voice commanding me to touch myself, make myself come.

  Of Cal standing over me, thick fingers wrapped around his arousal, his abdominal muscles flexing and twitching while he stroked his thick length. The way his eyes had blazed when they locked on me, on my body, like I was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.

  He hadn’t even touched me, had
been five steps away, but I’d felt his hands, his mouth sliding over my skin, his words like his lips were pressed against my ear.

  Afterward, he got me to lie back on my side and he’d carried on painting me. I’d fallen asleep, and when I woke, I was in his apartment alone. I’d wandered downstairs. Dane had been at the counter, and the look in his eyes when he saw me was intense, impossible to read. After he told me Cal was in his workroom with a client, I’d left.

  I’d slept most of the day away, and as much as I didn’t want to come to this schmooze fest, I’d had no choice. My father and Spencer were getting impatient with me, with my avoidance. My father’s situation was becoming critical—well, that’s what he kept telling me when he left messages and texts.

  I still didn’t know how he could even contemplate forcing me to make this kind of decision. I’d tried desperately to come up with a solution, but raising the kind of money I needed seemed impossible. This morning I’d had two more rejections from investors I’d approached. My family was a bad bet, and apparently, everyone knew it.

  Either I married a man I didn’t love, or I lost the only family I had left.

  I disappointed my father.

  I failed him again.

  Could I do that?

  God, could I hurt my grandmother like that? Tear down her world and leave her anchorless. Watch her lose everything she loved.

  A shiver wracked through me so strong I nearly dropped my glass of champagne.

  A hand landed on my back. “Easy there, sweetheart.”

  My head shot around, and my gaze collided with Spencer’s.

  “You’ve been avoiding me.” Not a question.

  I had most definitely been avoiding him.

  But now he was standing right beside me, I knew avoiding my current nightmare was over. I had to play this carefully, though. Angering him would not be good for me or my father. I took a sip of my drink, needing time to gather my thoughts. “I needed time alone to think.”

  His fingers walked across my back, curling around my waist, and he gave me a squeeze. “I understand that, it’s a big decision, but I’m getting impatient, Cassandra.”

  “Spencer—”

  “I thought tonight we’d take a step in the right direction.”

  I tried to move out of his hold, but he tugged me closer. “What do you mean? What are you going to do?”

  He started walking, taking me with him. “If we’re going to announce our engagement soon, we need to be seen together more. People need to see us as a couple for this to be believable.”

  “I’m not…we can’t—”

  “John, so good to see you,” Spencer said, pulling me into a tight circle of people. Friends of my father, ranch owners and associates that Spencer was desperately trying to win over. His father was not a nice man, and over the years he’d severed many relationships with his ruthless and often underhanded business tactics.

  These men were from old influential families in Springhaven, from ranches that had been around for decades, like my father’s. They stuck together, and all Spencer’s efforts to wheedle his way in, to use them to advance his own agenda, had failed.

  I was his golden ticket.

  John shook Spencer’s hand then his gaze dropped to me, to Spencer’s fingers curled around my hip. “Cassandra, nice to see you again.”

  I smiled politely. “You, too, John. It’s been far too long.”

  Spencer cut in with a low chuckle. “That would be my fault. I’m afraid I’ve been occupying most of Cassy’s time, haven’t I, darling?”

  I jolted in shock at his lie and inwardly winced. He’d never called me Cassy before, and I hated it coming from him now. I never thought I’d ever want anyone else to call me that again after Chris died, but when Cal had it had felt right, because Cal saw me, the real me. The Cassy that only my brother knew.

  Spencer knew nothing about me.

  I’d obviously taken too long to reply because Spencer gave me another squeeze, his fingers digging into my hip hard enough to leave a bruise as he pressed his cold, moist lips to my temple.

  “Isn’t that right, sweetheart?”

  I had no choice but to roll with his nightmarish role-playing or make a scene and make all this even worse than it already was. “Ah, yes, you have.”

  “I had no idea. How long have you been seeing each other?” John asked me.

  “A few months,” Spencer said, butting in. “When you’ve met your match, you just know.”

  John looked across the room to his wife and warmth filled his eyes. “That you do.”

  “Just between us,” Spencer said, “a rather happy announcement might be coming in the very near future.”

  I froze, the blood in my veins turning to ice. I felt numb.

  “Well,” John said. “That is good news.” John shook Spencer’s hand. “Let’s get together for lunch soon, son.”

  “I’d like that very much, sir,” Spencer said, a breathless note to his voice.

  As John walked away, Spencer turned to me, eyes bright. He was looking at me like I was a goose and had just laid my first golden egg.

  The night got progressively worse. We made the rounds, and Spencer made sure everyone in the room thought we were an item. Every time I faltered or resisted, he dug his fingers into my hip. I knew without doubt I had a bruise there, and I couldn’t stop my wince when he did it again.

  The person we were talking to looked at me with concern. “These shoes,” I said lightheartedly. “They may be pretty, but they’re not made for all this walking about.”

  The men chuckled, indulging the silly, flighty female, and carried on talking.

  I needed to get the hell out of there. My father had avoided me all night, watching us from afar and doing nothing to prevent the nightmare unfolding. My nightmare.

  “Will you excuse me, gentlemen?” I said. “I’ve just seen someone I need to talk to.”

  “Hurry back, darling,” Spencer said, planting another sloppy kiss on my cheek.

  I forced a smile then spun and walked calmly through the crowd of people toward the other side of the room. As soon as I was sure I was out of Spencer’s sight, I rushed toward the exit. I couldn’t stand another moment at his side or having his grasping hands on me.

  I was barely holding it together. God, I was suffocating. How could my father do this to me? How? I shoved through the main doors of the hotel and out onto the street, sucking in a deep breath, desperately trying to calm myself down.

  My throat started to burn suddenly, from suppressing my anger, the helplessness that I’d been biting back, burying deep for weeks, from holding in a primal scream that felt like it could crack the ground beneath me if I let it loose.

  “Cassandra!” Spencer rushed out after me. “Where are you going?”

  He tried to grab my elbow, but I pulled out of his hold. “I need to leave.”

  “I’d like you to stay,” he said, voice hard, moving closer. I stepped back until I was pressed against the front of the building.

  “I’m not your wife, Spencer, not yet. You don’t get to tell me what the hell to do.”

  He slid his hands around my waist, for once, gently. “No, not yet. At least you’ve accepted it’s only a matter of time.”

  I hadn’t accepted a damn thing, but telling him would only piss him off and I had no desire to deal with him like that. Some other guests walked out, people we’d talked to.

  “Kiss me goodbye,” he said under his breath. “Like a good girlfriend would.”

  I started to shake my head. “I’m not kissing you.”

  “It wouldn’t be the first time we’ve kissed. Am I the only man to put his lips to yours?” he said. “You’re a beautiful woman, Cassandra, but your father tells me the scarring on your body”—he shook his head—“it must be distressing for you. You’ve kept yourself hidden, haven’t you?”

  I tried to pull free of his hold. “Let me go,” I hissed.

  “You want kids one day? Money? I’ll give i
t to you.” He slid his hand over my shoulder, over the fabric of my dress covering my scars. “Some might think I’m the one getting the raw deal here. Getting a less than perfect wife.” He shrugged. “But I don’t care about the scars. I still want you.” He pressed his hips forward. “See? Can you feel how hard I am? Have you ever been with a man, Cassandra?”

  My face heated with humiliation and anger.

  He released a ragged breath. “I can’t wait to teach you, to show you what it’s like to be with me. We will be good together, Cassy, I promise you that.” He leaned in, mouth an inch from mine, but he didn’t close the gap. Instead, he pressed his lips to my cheek. “I’ll be in touch.”

  I jerked back when he finally released me and watched him walk back into the building, a smirk planted firmly on his face.

  I couldn’t survive being that asshole’s wife, but the alternative—watching my father’s and my gran’s lives fall to pieces, being the reason they fell to pieces again—killed me.

  My mind scrambled for an answer as a sob crawled up my throat. Panic seized me and I spun around and rushed to the street, calling a cab as I ran.

  There was only one man I wanted to be my first, only one man I could ever imagine being with like that. One man I wanted with my entire body and soul. The need in me was clawing from the inside out. Fear over what my future might hold was a band around my throat, making it hard to breathe.

  I gripped my clutch in my hand when my phone started to ring, knowing it would be my father worried that I’d somehow screwed everything up for him. Worried about himself, his feelings, what he might lose. What about me? I’d lost Chris, too. I’d lost my brother and I wasn’t given the chance to grieve. My father had been so caught up in making others pay for what had happened, blaming everyone but himself or Chris.

  Making sure I knew I was no better than Chris’s friend, the one who had been in the accident. Joel, the friend who had supplied my brother with drugs, or so my father had told me, got the brunt of my father’s wrath. I didn’t really remember the guy, and I didn’t know the facts, but I knew whatever my father did to him couldn’t have been good.